no thanks
I didn’t make it to the table yesterday. It was too much. The family was just sitting down and I bolted. I got home and worked. I heated up some leftovers. I wrote an update script for the NitroVideo movies database. Then I put on Double Indemnity (which was excellent by the way). Had to get this mindset derailed. Then the phone rang, it was Bubs – he was distracted but we talked. That made me feel a little better. Then it rang again, this time it was Viv and the location of the call really took the depression plane that was barely sputtering along and sent it deep into a tailspin. Fuck.
I talked to some friends over chat and email and righted myself a bit. This is fucked up, but I have to adjust. They love me and I have to be there for them, no matter how painful it is for me. These kids need a strong daddy, even if he doesn’t really feel that way. I’ll adjust. It’s fucked up, but I’ll adjust. I have to.
I put on Snakes on a Plane and holy shit, that movie was so terribly bad it became well, still bad. I was laughing my ass off at just how bad it was. When snakes were killed, they made a little snakey scream of pain. Then there was the snake-vision camera (snakes see in green apparently). Don’t get me wrong, if you have a Y chromosome or have watched too many Hugh Grant movies, this will man-you-up (just like an Old Spice and Aqua Velva cocktail). I did find myself adding muthafukin’ to just about every noun afterwards. “Yogi, do you want a muthafukin’ Milkbone?”
Speaking of manly, I’ll be stacking a cord of firewood when I get home from work (I’m actually home now waiting for delivery). Good thing it was fairly warm yesterday, my cost-saving keep the heat off stance could have back-fired. I’m going to take a nice long bike ride this weekend at some point.
I just spotted this on ESPN.com …
what’s hot? that’s right… duck calling
- Project Redlight
- The Lovely Mistresses of George W Bush
- Smell Fresh for the Crusher
- Siran Stacy in deadly accident – you know I started making a comment on Jocelyn’s blog about funny names (Siran was named after Saran Wrap, but it was mispelled) and I found this article. This is perspective, my situation is bad, but it’s not even in the same solar system of Siran’s pain right now.
- Wooden Car with Split Personality
November 23rd, 2007 at 8:52 am
ahh, the joy of working the day after thanksgiving…..have a good weekend, and hang in there!
November 23rd, 2007 at 8:55 am
Mike D – hanging… not literally though
November 23rd, 2007 at 11:19 am
Damn, I wrote this totally lame encouraging comment – of the flowery pinkey pretty variety. Way too lame to post. So… um.. take care of yourself and, to quote Mike, hang in there.
November 23rd, 2007 at 11:46 am
Jazz – it’s appreciated, and to also quote Mike, ahh
November 23rd, 2007 at 12:10 pm
Nothing more manly than duck calling. Well, maybe tatting.
November 23rd, 2007 at 12:14 pm
Chris – oh take another look at that photo, notice the position of hands… i bet i could photoshop that into something unmanly (or extremely manly depending on your view of gloryholes)
November 23rd, 2007 at 1:38 pm
For the surreality files…
November 23rd, 2007 at 2:04 pm
The duck calling guy looks like a gay porn ad. You sure you didn’t Photoshop that from some other site??
I wish there was a way to make this all go away. What I know is that you will get beyond this to live joyously.
I believe in you Van.
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:46 pm
I’m so glad I’m female as that way I don’t have to put on a brave face and be manly, there again I could always just wear a fake beard.
Best wishes
November 23rd, 2007 at 8:10 pm
Van, I’m worried about you, Bud – you finished Snakes on a Plane. I don’t even have the courage to start it.
November 23rd, 2007 at 8:57 pm
Chris – please tell me you will knit me that, puuuhleeeeeaaasse
Open Grove Claudia – I believe that duck calling guy is what’s hot in some circles
Maddy – so you’re saying a sex change could save me some grief? hmm, i’m kind of attached to my junk (literally)
Marty – i will say that there are some things that can’t be unseen… i mean… there are some muthafukin’ things that can’t be unseen
November 24th, 2007 at 7:16 am
I’m the child of a divorce — I was five by the time the divorce was final. my dad was nowhere to be seen. he spent time with us but hated it. he was absolutely gone and my mom used us as tools of guilt. I know you are in HELL. I can’t imagine what you feel like, but the love you are giving your kids right now and the effort you are making to be strong for them and to be there for them is beyond words.
November 24th, 2007 at 9:16 am
Good Daddy. Me proud.
November 24th, 2007 at 9:29 am
Sankes On A Plane? What’s that one about? (Oh, how I love that joke!)
Except for the “real-life” element, sounds like you got in some quality movie-watchin’ time. And Duck calling?!?!? Dude! I AM SO THERE!
Papa Hemingway was a pussy! Did HE have a blog? Oh, no, not Ernie-boy! Too busy with his bullfighters…
November 24th, 2007 at 9:30 am
Wish there was something I could say that would make this all suck less.
Teaching Grace Green Day was sheer brilliance. She hasn’t put down the guitar since Wednesday. Her fingers look like raw hamburger. It even sounds good.
November 24th, 2007 at 4:48 pm
You are absolutely right. You have to be strong for your children. My children are the only fight I’ve ever chosen to fight.No one else has ever been worth it. My boys know it and they love me for it. Yours do too.
These circumstances will change, even it’s just your kids growing up. It will get better.
And please, no more mocking of Hugh Grant.
November 25th, 2007 at 1:34 am
Frick. I have to stop coming to your blog and just wanting to say, “Yea, what Franki said” and then going to her blog and typing, “I wanted to comment what FB said.”
But you guys are too good.
My wish for you: May watching SNAKES ON A PLANE be the lowest Thanksgiving you ever experience.
November 25th, 2007 at 10:52 am
Jodi – it’s hard not to feel a scarlet letter on me at times, but there are others that have gone through this, many that have not done well with the transition. if i concentrate on the kids it will come out right in the end
Dyna – me tired and sad, me need kids
Craig – that and all those 6 toed cats
Carolyn – i think Green Day is the path to me getting her to master barre chords too. i’m going deep into my catalog of songs i used to cover past.
Franki – i’m just jealous of his dreamy blue eyes and bad teeth
Jocelyn – Franki rocks a pink hat well too
November 25th, 2007 at 11:58 am
It’s always good to break with tradition occasionally.
cheers
November 25th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Maddy – certainly, cheers back at ya
November 27th, 2007 at 8:23 am
Snakey scream of pain. Lol. And hot duck calling. In a nature loving mood are we?