getting off the mat again
Well found out that the first interview hired another candidate, which really sucks. I thought there was a great match but ultimately my salary requirements were too high (although I was willing to accept their range) and although my side work was not an issue in the interview, it became one during the decision process. Now I’ve got worry. The severance runs out quickly, the health insurance ends soon, … way to provide for your family champ.
I’m doing my best to pick myself off the mat again and keep my chin up, at least for the kids. This is horrible. Not to apply even more dark colors to this painting, but another concern I’ve got is that I can’t afford my anti-depressants (the cost tripled when I changed jobs, even with the new insurance) and I’ve started titrating myself off them. I’m going to get out and run, which is really good for a sad head. My back is finally feeling well enough to do so after the compounded issues from the accident, a fall down the icy backstairs at work, and the issues I was having with spasms several months ago.
When I get out of this. I’m going to run up the Philly Art Museum steps and collapse in tears and exhaustion. That’s what I’m focusing on. I’m going to beat this, I don’t care how many of you might be rooting against me.
This song is so fucking appropriate for my feeling of desperation right now, I’m screaming May Day in my own life right now. Mike Patton is a fucking genius in case you were wondering…
My Pathfinder is finally ready after the body work repairs from the accident. It was in the shop for over 3 weeks because the body shop had to order parts from a supplier in Tennessee instead of more local suppliers (shop owner even told me that the local suppliers are cheaper too – makes you wonder).
I had a good meeting with the guys from Climate Skateboards last night. I’ve got a few small changes to make to the draft and then I’ll be launching this puppy. Justin mentioned his tattoo guy needs a site, so I’ll hopefully get a chance to talk to the shop owner soon. I finished some work to Chris‘ WordPress theme sidebar to make it fully widget compatible, after poking around her backend erm,… I mean admin area, I saw a couple more fixes and should be finishing up with those changes this morning. I finished Sore Thumbs Store yesterday and hopefully a couple bucks will start coming in there. I at least had fun drawing the sore thumb dude. I also got in touch with a former co-worker from TD Commerce and the owner of Sageth.com for a potential site overhaul.
- Kings Firecrackers – thanks Mel
- Masterbate-a-thon – thanks Sugarplum’s Mom
- Blog Bumper Stickers – thanks Chris
- EAT MANGURT – thanks Chris… whatever you do, do not look up mangurt at Urban Dictionary… ok, fine, here’s the link – you were warned.
- SHATNER QUAKE!
- iSnort – so wrong
- xkcd : Packages
- Deluxe Hugs $2
- Give yourself horselegs – this reminds me of that fucked up show that’s on late on Adult Swim.
- doihavepigflu.com
- Own a .tv domain? well, that might not work out so well…
- Awkward Boners
May 1st, 2009 at 8:41 am
Ahem. I glad you clarified that.
Hang in there… I’m glad the kids are with you to help keep you going.
May 1st, 2009 at 8:51 am
“You’re good enough, you’re smart enough and dog gone it, people like you.”
Does that help?
Thea last blog post..Oh hai!
May 1st, 2009 at 8:55 am
Chris – np, and they do help
Thea – yes all better, that was it. all i needed was a quote from a bad SNL skit and viola, no more problems
May 1st, 2009 at 9:09 am
Sounds like a very bumpy ride Van, a ride you do not deserve nor were responsible for.
A neighbour recently summed it up: “doing the right thing doesn’t always pay”.
Let’s hope for the best – sometimes it just takes an instance to get that lucky break.
Peter last blog post..The royal Belgian greenhouses and palace: a personal visit
May 1st, 2009 at 9:20 am
That job wasn’t right for you. Everything happens for a reason. Something better is coming. I know this.
Sucky about the antidepressants. Run your ass off.
It’ll be OK. xo
Finn last blog post..Finn’s Alphabet—Right Now
May 1st, 2009 at 9:37 am
what you take ?
Insurance in the states is crazy..
In Puerto rico it was simple ..you pay a hundred something a month, and you get a list of drs and you see one 10 dollars for regular 15 for a specialtist and get your meds and pay 15 per script.
then blood work and tests you paid like 20 % or something like that ..
But its basic and simple to figure out .
My insurance in texas is twice what I paid in pr, and I cant understand it to save my life..
It doesnt make sense ..
Im a smart woman., and i talked to the insurance person in our head office and even she didnt know what to say about it .
all i know is my hormones now cost me twice as much..
its bullshit
Cynnie last blog post..Pepto pink bra
May 1st, 2009 at 12:46 pm
This too shall pass. I’m sorry it’s tough.
May 1st, 2009 at 1:12 pm
I am so sorry things seem so scary and uncertain right now. That has to be the worst feeling! I wish I could do something concrete to help you/make you feel better but for now I will just think good happy peaceful thoughts. If you can think of anything I could do to help for real, please let me know!
Is there any other place you could get your antidepressants from? It doesn’t seem like a great time to be getting off of them. I know for certain without mine I would be a crazy mess and my life is pretty much regular right now. Does your doctor have samples that could get you through? Does your doctor have any suggestions for you? It seems like things like that should be taken care of even if you can’t do it yourself right now. Maybe if you asked? Maybe your doctor might have an idea to help?
tori last blog post..Baby Puppy
May 1st, 2009 at 2:50 pm
Ufff, wrote a long piece and decided it might not be as deeply amusing as I was imagining so I’m going to make do with sending a huge comment hug.
Di last blog post..Exhibition, June 2009
May 1st, 2009 at 3:52 pm
Well, fuck, it might help if people like me made a freakin’ decision. Yeah, yeah, I suck. Sorry Van.
On a limb with Claudia last blog post..Friday Fiction .: The Fey :. Chapter Twelve
May 1st, 2009 at 5:08 pm
Peter – i’m honestly worried about what to do at this point
Finn – i will do my best to run it off, swear
Cynnie – lexapro, was only $25/month at good job, went up to $87/month at evil job, will be over $150 with no job
mamatulip – oh it will pass alright
tori – i’ve tried mail order, everything, sucks
Di – thanks amiga
On a Limb with Claudia – you don’t suck amiga, you never do.
May 1st, 2009 at 5:35 pm
I’m sorry dude. This totally sucks. I wish there was something i could do, but as i don’t have a job to offer, i’ll just send some good wishes.
meno last blog post..Soylent green
May 1st, 2009 at 9:22 pm
Van, check with your state and your county. Many states will provide some mental health coverage for medications when you don’t have insurance and they will also provide some medical health coverage, time limited, if you have children in your household. It differs from state to state and county to county but well worth checking out. I know this because this is what I do for a living. Also, if you are being prescribed medications the prescribing doc cannot just stop prescribing by law so talk to your doc about that and also about any medication plans the pharmacuetical company that makes your meds offers. Many offer free meds for those who can’t afford them in 90 day supplies but it has to be set up through your doc. Your doc could also give you samples if you explain what’s happening to you right now which would get you through this time in your life. Check into it before you make any decisions to cut your meds. And, if you can take a generic, WalMart offers most generics for only $4 a pop.
Take care of yourself mister. This will pass which, I know, is a hollow phrase at a time like this but it will. So hang in there! Hugs!
May 2nd, 2009 at 7:52 am
you are better without that job. I am sure that you could find a more better job than that.
Palabuzz last blog post..Charice Pempengco releases new album
May 2nd, 2009 at 7:56 am
I checked with a local MD who told me Lexapro is definitely overpriced in the US: the producer (Lundbeck) sells it for €30-$40 (full retail for 10mg/1 month) in Belgium. Many people switch to the much cheaper generic Citalopram (R/Celexa) given it is chemically very similar. Do check with your MD.
Peter last blog post..The royal Belgian greenhouses and palace: a personal visit
May 2nd, 2009 at 10:29 am
i’m officially never feeling sorry for myself again. pretty sure if i was in your circumstances my head would be under a pillow right about now…… we are all rooting for you…
Madge last blog post..Taking The Day Off
May 3rd, 2009 at 8:00 pm
dang, i am sorry to hear it. prayers for a job soon, that allows you to provide for your kids and your own needs well. and lots of big hugs.
lime last blog post..Update